Is there a right time to Wallow?


I am focused. I am healthy. I am persistent. These are some of the Daily Affirmations for this week in A Year of ME. They are good ones for any day and every day. We all need positive pieces of light to combat the world's negativity constantly at our front door waiting to get in at the first crack like a fly on a hot summer's day. Then you're like, "how'd that fly get in here?" or "where did THAT come from?" How long should you keep fretting over the how and the why? It's here, so you have to deal with it. But is there ever a right time to just wallow? How much time is enough to just let yourself be melancholy and in disbelief about what has happened to you. Is there any benefit?

A friend recently got a job offer in their field and was super excited! Until she did the math and her energy plummeted. For DAYS. When I tried to encourage her, she all but said, "Get out of here with all that encouragement and positivity, manage your energy mumbo jumbo, law of attraction, hippie crap!" Hey, I give people all the space they need. God has promised me that my only job is to plant a seed, and He will take care of the rest.

Is there a right time to wallow? At one low point in my life when my home wasn't happy, and my boss was being a d*** (yes I said it, and I mean it), I found myself just wallowing in a dark place. I was crying to a mentor, who is more like a mother-mentor, who said "Ok. That's enough. You get one more day. Cry your eyes out and do what you have to. And then tomorrow you move forward. That's it. Talk to you later."

I was like…gasp, gulp, huhhh??? What just happened there? I blew my nose, sat up straight and understood. Yes, there is a time to wallow. We're only human. But give it a deadline. And then choooose to work on turning it around. We dive unconsciously into sadness and stress because things like rejection, loss and perceived failures take us out of our game.

Your natural state is healthy. Your natural emotion is happiness. Your natural desire is for love and harmony. When you are not in your natural state, then something has taken you out of your game. It's ok to hang out there for a while, but it's not where you truly belong. Like traveling and staying at a hotel in a foreign bed. How nice is it when you get back home to your own bed??

So Wallow. Go deep and really suffer if you must. Go on and take the rest of the day off. You get 1 more day. Then get up tomorrow and shift the trajectory. Go find that positive friend (call me :) ). Open the blinds and watch a comedy. Start finding your way back home to your natural state. That's where your true wellbeing lies.

To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heavens. A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted. A time to kill and a time to heal; a time to break down and a time to build up. A time to weep and a time to laugh; a time to mourn and a time to dance. Ecclesiastes 3:1-4

UGottaEat…so eat mindfully.