Excuses Have Uses

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We all have excuses in common. They masquerade as reasons but can be very useful when you don’t want to do something. Let me tell you about my favorite family of Excuses and how they have helped me on my path to wellness…

There’s a family that lived with me growing up, The Excuses. Usually you find one family member to connect with, but I loved them all. My closest friend was I-Cant Excuse. We called her Cant for short. My mother hated for me to hang out with her.  Whenever mom wanted me to do something, I ran to Cant for help. I-Cant tie my shoe. I-Cant get good grades. I-Cant find me a boyfriend!

Her twin brother was Not Goodnuff Excuse. We used to go together, and I let him follow me around all the way through High School, until one day I had to break up with him.  Not Goodnuff and I-Cant were not identical twins, but they sure were inseparable. We were like 3 peas in a pod. It was because of them I didn’t try out to be a Cheerleader, didn’t dance in public until I was a teenager, and never, ever spoke out in class unless called upon. I-Cant and Not Goodnuff had all of my attention. 

There was an older sister, Time Excuse. She was always gone, so to avoid any chores or responsibilities we would tell our parents that we needed to find Time. That always seemed to work! 

There was the grandmother, Money Excuse. You can read the eulogy for Money’s Funeral which I told you about just last October. I couldn’t get enough of her, but I had to stop using that Excuse a long time ago. RIP Money.

The mother of all Excuses was Dunno-Y Excuse. She supported the entire family and was always there to be called upon when any of the other Excuses just weren’t up to the task at hand. When I-Cant, Not Goodnuff, and Time Excuse weren’t around, I too called on Dunno-Y. 

We began to drift apart as I matured and realized I was taking advantage of my relationship with the Excuses. I was using Excuses way too much. But now, I am proud not to use my old friends, and when I see them I am reminded to stand on my own abilities…

When I see I-Cant, I remember that I can.

When Not Goodnuff tries to catch up with me, I remind myself that I can do better.

When I think about Time and Money Excuses which I idolized, I remember to be grateful for all I have and that my power is in the present. 

Dunno-Y Excuse still comes around often.  Whenever I have a problem, Dunno shows up and brings cousin Y-me. When Dunno-Y and Y-me Excuse show up, there is always a reason. Because I am aware and practice mindfulness, their visits are like a bell reminding me to wake up and uncover what is behind these great Excuse visitations.  Then like a big Aha! flash of knowing, I answer the unanswered, and I live my best life.   

In this way, when you are mindful and present, you too can live your best life because… Excuses have uses!

What are yours?

When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways.  -1 Corinthians 13:11

Love & Light,

TK