A Remedy for “No one Gets Me!”

No one gets me.jpg

Everyone sees you just as you envision yourself in your own head, right?  Wrong.  It’s confusing when you get a bad review at work, get into an argument with your mate, or you’re selling something that no one is buying…how you could be so misunderstood?  At times we have all felt that “no one gets me” feeling.  I assume I am leaving you with a good impression.  But the impression you receive about me is based on your upbringing and your likes and dislikes.  So why do we constantly take things personally? You’re probably saying, what the hell is Tonya talking about now? Stay with me.  Here are common examples …

I feel unattractive because people like much thinner body types.  Even though I am healthy and have a pretty face ☺, I feel fat because of the models, and all the beautiful famous people (defined by what the magazine ads, what the men in power and skinny women say), are smaller than me.  My self-esteem is based on how I measure up to others.

Orrrr... I should have more money to do things that other people do.  Again, this self-judgment is based on what OTHER people have.  When realistically, when you are doing the best you can with the resources that you have, you should feel great about that!  And this is a great place to be.  Mindfulness brings you back to the light side when you start to go dark. 

And here is the point…

Absolutely agree 100% that everyone wants to belong and be understood.  But there’s also time to accept YOU the way you are no matter what others think.  When you’ve done all you can do, you’ve done enough. There is no I should have done this, or I could have done that. We do this to make ourselves feel in control about how an outcome could have played out, but really it only deepens the regret. Let it go.

When you do your best in each moment and choose wisely in the present, then your decision is by definition made in perfect harmony. There are a bazillion possibilities in life all impacted by the collective. Had you made a different decision, someone else would have also made a different decision, and so on and so forth. And there AGAIN, you couldn’t possibly predict THAT outcome any better than the outcome you actually experienced. So stop it.

And here is the really good news… By allowing others the freedom to enjoy their true selves without judgment from you, you free yourself from being bound by their judgment. It’s circular. It starts with you though. “Get” other people. Respect their space, their talents, their looks, and their journey. Don’t judge. And just as surely, you will receive the benefit of not feeling judged! You belong. It’s the gift of receiving what you give. It’s the infinite exchange.

So simply put, the remedy to that gut-wrenching feeling of “No One Gets Me,” is to “Get Someone Else.” 

I Get You.

UGottaEat…so eat mindfully.

Feeding the mind, body, and spirit.

Call to action to anyone who ever had the feeling, at one time or another, that “no one gets me:” Global Food Day was October 16th.  In recognition, please practice mindful eating or food awareness on whatever day you happen to read this blog.  Do a kindness for someone and give the gift of non-judgment.  I suggest you share a meal. ☺ #zerohunger

Love and light,

TK